Unwell
by Wednesdayite13
Summary: Shockwave is ill...that's basically it
1. Unwell

**Contains Vampirella x Knockout, a strangely caring Megatron and a really cranky Shockwave. I don't own Transformers, Hasbro do. But I do own Vampirella, since that's me. Seriously, why do we have to do this? Like some randomer on is gonna get people to believe that they own Transformers  
Haters gonna hate. If you're not completely insane, don't read any of my work. It will make no sense to you. If you are completely insane, welcome. We've been expecting you. If you are a normal boring person who pretends to be completely insane, the zombies are after you! Don't speak Latin, or they will kill you with stolen shoes and laptop chargers! Good day  
Oh, also this story is from my mind where Blurr and Perceptor are former Decepticons. Anyway, I'm gonna shut up now and let those who haven't switched off already get on with the story.**

Shockwave was really unwell. They didn't know what was wrong though. Knockout was out and Vampirella was missing. She'd been missing for Solar Cycles. There was only one other medic they knew of, and he was an Autobot. Yeah, they had no chance. The only thing they could do was wait for Knockout to return.

Meanwhile, on the Steelhaven.  
"I don't know my way around the Nemesis!" The black and white mech complained.  
"I do." The blue speedy one reassured. "Being-a-former-Decepticon-helps-with-things-like-this. I'll-persuade-Sentinel-to-let-me-go-with."  
"OK, great."

"It's getting dark, we should probably be going back." Breakdown said.  
"Hmm, you're probably right." Knockout agreed.

Blitzwing noticed something was wrong with Shockwave, but the spy tended to keep to himself.  
"Are you OK?" He finally asked.  
"Huh?" Shockwave was briefly distracted. "Oh, I'm fine." He lied.  
Blitzwing was about to say something else, but the door opened. In walked Vampirella.  
"Where have you been?" Shockwave asked.  
"Oh." She reached into her blue and white Thundercat bag and pulled out a huge block of Cheddar cheese. "I went cheese shopping."  
"You've been missing for Solar Cycles." Said Blitzwing.  
Vampirella was already eating her cheese. "They had lots of cheese." She finished her mouthful before asking "Are you OK Shocky?"  
Shockwave sighed. "Yes, I'm fine!"

"OK, sneak onto the Nemesis, download a few files, no problem." Jazz said calmly. He was just trying not to freak out.  
"Stop complaining and get to it." Sentinel shouted.  
"No! I'll not stop complaining! Why don't you do it?!"  
"I'm a Prime, I don't have to."  
Jazz glared at the glitch-head Prime before transforming and driving off to meet Blurr.

Shockwave did something that shocked all the other Decepticons. Something he never did before. He stopped his work and rested for a while.  
"AAH!" Vampirella yelled. "ARMAGEDDON!"

The door to the main room opened and Knockout entered.  
"Sorry we took so long, we stopped to race." Knockout apologized to Megatron. They were only supposed to be scouting for energon.  
"Obviously, what else do you ever do?"  
Knockout laughed. "Well-"  
"Don't tell me what you do in your spare time, Knockout. I don't want horrible, mental images."  
Knockout laughed again. "What do you take me for?"  
Megatron walked towards the door. "I'd tell you Knockout, but I have something important to get to. It's called a life, you should get one of those." He left the room but Knockout followed.  
"Wow, how long have you had one of those? Must be fairly new." Knockout joked.  
Megatron laughed. "If you have your optics on one, Knockout, I wouldn't bother. I don't think it's for you."

Jazz and Blurr saw Megatron with Knockout. "Scrap!" They both whispered, keeping to the shadow hoping they wouldn't be spotted. Luckily, the two Decepticons walked straight past them.  
Jazz sighed with relief. "This better be worth it."

Shockwave looked really worn out, Vampirella and Blitzwing noticed this. The spy had started his work again, the resting didn't really last.  
"Are you sure you're OK?" Vampirella asked. "Maybe you should recharge or something."  
"No I'm fine, really." Shockwave then stopped for a nano-klik.  
"Shocky? What's wrong?" She asked.  
"Our files...someone's downloading them."  
Vampirella reached for her stick (what an epic weapon) and ran out the door with Blitzwing to find the downloaders. Is that a word? Oh well, it is now.  
Shockwave continued his work.

Jazz noticed the downloading had stopped. He stepped back only to feel something pressing against his back. Blurr gasped and turned around to face Blitzwing and Vampirella.  
"OK. I was fine with you joining the Autobots, Zippy." Said the vampire. "But leading another Autobot to the Nemesis to steal our files?!"

"I knew this was a bad idea" Jazz said mainly to himself. They had been captured.  
"I'm-sorry-Jazz-I-didn't-know-this-would-happen-I-should-have-been-on-the-look-out-I'm-so-sorry"  
"It's OK, don't apologize. It's not your fault"

"Shouldn't Jazz and Zippy be back by now?" Jetfire asked.  
"The Decepticons have probably caught them." Said Sentinel. "Trust them to blow it."  
"Jetfire, Jetstorm, see if you can get through to them." Ultra Magnus ordered.

"Ah, Shockwave. How are you getting on?" Megatron asked, standing in the doorway.  
"Oh...O-OK."  
Megatron walked properly into the room, shutting the door behind him. (Don't get pervish thoughts here!) "You look terrible, you sound it too."  
"I'm OK, really. But you should probably know that two Autobots have been caught downloading our files. They're in cells now."  
"Oh, good work Shockwave. Now, you should rest."  
Shockwave sighed. He was probably right. "OK." He gave in.

"W-What's gonna happen? You were a Decepticon, what will they do?" Jazz asked.  
"I-I-don't-know-I've-never-been-involved-with-captured-Autobots" Jazz could tell that Blurr was panicking. He was highly claustrophobic, so being stuck in a cell was pretty horrible. He was just glad he wasn't alone.

Vampirella wanted to see if Shockwave was OK. She knocked but she got no answer so she let herself in.  
"...KNOCKOUT!"

Knockout rushed to Shockwave's room.  
"Oh. Primus. Vampirella, what did you do?!"  
"I didn't do anything." Vampirella protested. "Wow, I actually didn't do anything. That's a first."

Jazz and Blurr also heard Vampirella shout for Knockout.  
"That sounded desperate."  
"Jazz-my-comm-link-is-damaged, is-yours?"  
Jazz checked. "No. But wouldn't they notice if I tried to call someone?"  
"It-sounds-like-they're-busy-it's-worth-a-try-someone's-been-trying-to-get-through-I-can-tell-but-I-can't-answer-and-I-don't-know-who."  
"Wait, someone's trying to get through to me now." Jazz answered his comm link.  
"JAZZ!"  
"Fire! Storm! Wow am I glad to hear you two." Jazz looked over to Blurr who looked as glad as he was.  
"Sentinel is getting..." Jetstorm started. "Actually he's still pretty normal."  
The two captured Autobots laughed.  
"Guys we were caught." Jazz told them.

After what seemed like ages, Shockwave woke up in the med bay.  
"Hey, how are you feeling?" Shockwave could make out a red blurr, but the voice gave away that it was Knockout. He also saw a black and yellow blurr next to him who he assumed was Vampirella.  
"O-OK. What happened?"  
"I went to see if you were OK." Yes, that was Vampirella. He could tell by the half Sheffield, half Derbyshire accent. "But you must have passed out."

"Shockwave, I heard what happened. Are you sure you should be up?" Megatron was genuinely concerned.  
"Knockout said I'm fine as long as I don't do anything too stressful."

Vampirella was with her friends Jade, Elise and Taryn. They were rehearsing for the next SJS, Crazy Teachers 2. Vampirella was playing her German teacher.  
"OK. The third thing I want you to do is this, the second thing is this, I have a baby, and the first thing is this." She said, saying her S's like 'sh' just like her teacher did. She was wearing a white shirt, tight jeans and a cowboy hat like he did in his band.  
Jade raised her hand. "What's the baby's name?"  
"Drury junior." They then broke into song. They started with Lady in Red but ended with Maniac.  
"Now now, settle down class. It's your own time your wasting." Vampirella said, still dancing around even though the music had stopped. "Now." She wrote the word 'Obst' on the board. "What does this begin with? Elise?"  
"Banana."  
This actually happened in class.  
That's when Shockwave and Megatron walked in on them. Shockwave was still fairly week. Vampirella was startled so she threw a calculator at Megatron.  
Taryn looked over to Vampirella. "Why did you do that?"  
"I have no idea." She flew to where her calculator landed, picked it up and tried to eat it. It didn't work so she put it on her head instead.

**I will carry this on. I'm writing a sequel called Recovery. Also, I always do that with my calculator. Just so you know.**


	2. Recovery

Perceptor decided to drop in to see the only few bots he actually got on with.  
"Hey, you're missing two."  
"Perceptor! Jazz and Zippy are still on the Nemesis." Jetfire told him  
"Oh no. Tell me they weren't."  
They both nodded.

Jazz and Blurr needed energon badly, but they doubted they were gonna get any. They were hugging each other both for warmth and so they knew the other was still online.  
They flinched when Skywarp transwarped outside the cell. They both expected the worst, so they hugged each other more tightly. They then noticed he was holding two energon cubes.  
"Hey, it's OK. Don't be afraid." He held out the energon cubes.  
Jazz and Blurr were a little reluctant to take them.  
"They're not poisoned, if that's what you're thinking."  
They took them. Blurr looked over to Jazz who took a little sip. It tasted great. He nodded to Blurr who then drank some.  
"Thanks."  
"No prob." Skywarp transwarped elsewhere, leaving the two to enjoy their energon.

"Anyway." The calculator fell off Vampirella's head, so she caught it and typed in 3.141592654 (Pi) for no reason whatsoever. "How are you Shocky?"  
"I'm OK. Thank you."  
"Why?" Elise asked. "What happened?"  
Vampirella explained. "He spoke Latin which awoke the zombies who tried to offline Shocky with shoes and laptop chargers but the Ovaltine Orangutans came and used a silver box to trap the zombies but they dropped the silver box causing a little purple butt monkey to cause chaos throughout the Nemesis until a kettle dropped on them turning them into sparkly dragonflies which flew away to meet the Duke of Orange."

The three bots heard gun shots and explosions. Probably Decepticons. They took off in the Steelhaven before they got hit. Sentinel and Ultra Magnus were away leaving Perceptor, Jetfire and Jetstorm. None of them were that good at flying that thing so it was only a matter of time before they crashed.  
"But we don't even know where the Nemesis is." Jetstorm pointed out.  
"Like Starscream said. It's a ship, it moves." Jetfire added.  
Perceptor knew it was a long shot, but... "I still have Vampirella's comm link frequency. Maybe if we could bribe her somehow, she may give us the location."  
"Bribing her should be easy. Tell her we've got cheese and Vodka." Said Jetfire.

Shockwave noticed three Autobots were heading towards the Nemesis. He was about to warn the nearest Decepticon, but he was too late. He was still very weak and really shouldn't be working for this long.

"Jazz? Zippy?" Perceptor whispered.  
"Perceptor! Thank Primus!" Jazz was relieved. Blurr would be too but he was leaning on Jazz's shoulder, recharging. They woke him but he was still really tired to he had to lean on Perceptor. They were about to leave, but Skywarp walked in on them. They expected him to shoot, but he just stood aside and let them pass.  
"I didn't see anything." He whispered.

"I'm sorry. I noticed but it was too late." Shockwave apologized.  
"It's OK. But how did they even find us?" Megatron asked.  
Vampirella was silent.  
"V!"  
"They had cheese and Vodka!"


End file.
